CLASSIC-JOKE

ADVERTISEMENT IN A Shop: Guitar, for sale........ Cheap........ .......no  strings attached.                                 Ad. In Hospital Waiting Room:  Smoking Helps You Lose Weight.... One Lung At A  Time!                                   On a bulletin board:  Success Is Relative.  The more The Success, The more The  Relatives.   When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking.... I Gave Up Reading   My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses.... He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.   Sign In A Bar: 'Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In Advance.'    Sign In Driving School: If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way....  Behind Every Great Man, There Is A Surprised Woman.  The Reason Men Lie Is Because Women Ask too Many Questions.  Getting Caught  Is The Mother Of Invention.   Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Snore And You Sleep Alone  The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists  Elsewhere In The Universe  Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us. Sign At A Barber Shop : We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business..  Sign In A Restaurant:  All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.